let’s start preaching
Jesus, Trump and Censorship. Through the Lincoln Project, a new school year begins…
And then when the final bell rings, it’s off to the meat packing plant to get that equipment nice and shiny. have fun kids
cheer and cheer for Thursday, 24 August 2023
Comment: a quick reminder that there will be No C&J on Monday. In its place would be an image of Ron DeSantis doing something no human has ever done with a pineapple. Parental discretion is advised. Come back Tuesday to help lift Jaws off the floor.
By the numbers:
Days until the next Full Blue Moon: 6
for days Around the World Cultural Food Festival In Alexandria, Virginia, 2
The median price of a home sold in July, up 1.9% from July last year: $406,700
Over the years the value of the Chinese Yuan has been as low as it is now: 16
there’s a 100% chance ChinaThe fertility rate has fallen below 1.09 (lifetime births per woman) JapanExtremely low rate: 100%
Number of states that broke rainfall records during Tropical Storm Hillary (MT, ID, OR, NV): 4
year during which NevadaPrevious record of rain made: 1906
Your Thursday Molly Ivins moment:
Afghanistan what is nation building Afghanistan To fight—the last place on earth you would choose, if you had a choice.
I am not saying this to oppose the idea that I think we have no choice but to underline that this task is difficult, long and incredibly complex. […] While some of us are searching for the answer to the question, “Why do they hate us?” Radio talk show voices replying, “Who cares? Give them nuclear weapons.” Those who think this isn’t a bad plan should heed an already classic lead by Barry Bierk of The New York Times: “If the Americans Are Seeking to Bomb Afghanistan in the Stone Age, They Should There is no need to go far to know that this country does this. It is a place of mutilated cities, dry land and downtrodden people after the apocalypse.”
Puppy picture of the day: cleared for takeoff…
to encourage For today’s Kodak moment. If what I read in the newspapers is true, today is the 45th dayth President of United States of america Creates History. Today Donald J. Trump Dedication like a dog to law enforcement officials in Georgia, where he will be handcuffed, booked, fingerprinted, given mug-shots, hosed down, fed a complimentary bowl of oatmeal, chained for a few hours Will be taken to work on gangs, then returned to bang out some license plates, and finally be sent back to the bleach fumes at his sex palace in Bedminster, New Jersey that is so dear to him. Here’s a mug shot placeholder we found:
Cockroaches at the Fulton County Jail have already filed a complaint about the sudden influx of vermin at the facility, according to sources, and will proceed to read the signs. prison reform now, If it helps, I’ll sign your petition, little friend.
to encourage Famous for the first. A little history was made in Minnesota this week when Governor Tim Walz (I know him! Look at me, I’m name-dropping! Tim and I, we’re going way too far back!, A new Chief Justice has been appointed State Supreme Court Maga Creed will not be pleased as her skin color is discolored:
Governor Tim Walz on Wednesday promoted Natalie Hudson as chief justice of the Minnesota Supreme Court, making her the first black person to lead it. […]
“Justice Hudson is one of our state’s most experienced jurists. He has a strong reputation as a leader and consensus builder, Walz said in a statement. “I am confident she will advance a vision that promotes fairness and preserves the dignity of all Minnesotans.” […]
Hudson She began her legal career in 1982 as a staff attorney for Southern Minnesota Regional Legal Services, where she represented low-income clients dealing with housing issues.
To help him deal with jerky lawyers and dimwitted litigants, he’ll find the customary gavel with a small flask hidden inside.
Derp! to rumble in Badger State Forest. I’m writing this recap of the August 23 Fox News GOP primary debate Milwaukee on May 25th so I can enjoy my summer in peace. But I’m in no mood to think about the 2024 election three months in advance, I have to complain again about how I’m in no mood to think about the 2024 presidential election 15 months before that terrible event . So I raided my archives circa 2011 and found my notes from that year’s Fox debates. I’m sure nothing has changed:
» Social Security is a Ponzi scheme.
, [Insert number here]-Point plans were large, but the specifications attached to them were not.
» Any sentence making a positive reference to the death penalty is certainly a line of praise. “I love cheeseburgers with BBQ sauce, bacon, and the death sentence.” [Rah!!!]
» Climate change is not supported by science. It is a myth, a hoax and/or a benevolent conspiracy to introduce socialism to the galaxy.
» of Hermann Cain “9-9-9“The plan is going to be a miracle cure Americadiseases of
, Last night’s villains were: Illegal immigrants, Planned Parenthood, Democratic (“demon rat”) presidents, IranHillary Clinton, and George Soros.
» Our Drinking Game: We take a sip every time someone says “failed policies of the past” and we take a shot every time someone says eliminate a government program or agency.
Everything perfectly accurate even in 2023, except for one exception: Donald Trump murdered Herman Cain at a rally in broad daylight with COVID-19. oklahoma In 2020 because he knew that Cain was a true threat to him. Of course, if you ask Trump spokesman Stephen Miller if this actually happened, he would certainly say this: “No! No! No!”
brief discretionary pause
end brief discretionary breaks
jeers put to death. 66 years ago this weekin 1957The the Soviet Union announced that it had successfully test-fired an intercontinental ballistic missile. It got a B in reading, an A in math and, oddly enough, a C- in rocket science.
to encourage To stick the landing. all of India This is a big Bollywood dance number today after the country’s space program landed successfully Its lander on the surface of the Moon after a pleasant journey of 239,000 miles:
Mission Accomplished IndiaIts status as a global superpower in space. first, only United States of america, China and former the Soviet Union soft landing on the lunar surface has been completed.
Chandrayaan-3’s landing site is closer to the South Pole of the Moon than any other spacecraft in history. The South Pole region is considered an area of major scientific and strategic interest for space travel nations, as scientists believe the region is home to water ice. Deposit. […]
The lander, called Vikram, after ejecting from the propulsion module completed the precise maneuvers required to perform a soft touchdown on the lunar surface. Hidden inside is Pragyan, a small, six-wheeled rover that will exit the lander by rolling down a ramp.
India Became the fourth country to land a spacecraft on the Moon. And I think we all know what’s about to hit a TV screen near you in the near future: Battlebots: Lunar Edition,
Ten years ago in C&J: August 24, 2013
jeers To falsify history. today’s boring improv goes out the daily beastJoe claims that neocon hack and former UN-hater John Bolton will be the first Republican presidential nominee – if he and his mustache make it to the polls –support gay marriage, No Truth, Fred Karger ran on the Republican ticket in 2012 (actually he polled well new Hampshire But she was kicked out of every debate, despite qualifying for it) And, well, I’ll let her clean up The Daily Beast’s Grumpy:
“I will work hard to end Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, pass the federal Employment Anti-Discrimination Act (ENDA), repeal the federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), make same-sex marriage the law of the land, and eliminate HIV/AIDS.” Make finding a vaccine to cure and prevent HIV a new national priority.”
Plus: Karger is gay himself—the first gay candidate to run for president. one of two Team. We’re sure The Daily Beast doesn’t regret its mistake and will keep making more in the future.
And just one more…
to encourage For spud studs. But August 24, 1853Created by Chef George “Crum” Speck first potato chips– which were originally called Saratoga Chips – after a fussy customer (Commodore Cornelius Vanderbilt) complained that his potatoes were not sliced thin enough. So the chef sliced them thinly out of desperation and the rest, as they say, is BBQ, salt and vinegar, ruffled, kettle-cooked, sometimes even packed in tennis-ball-canisters history. .
Here in the BiPM family, I’m not sure we’ve ever really thrown out the old bag of chips. When one is about an inch into pieces, we simply buy a new bag and leave the old one in the cupboard, and make a “mental note” to “finish that old bag before starting on the new one.” Give.” never happens. And now we have Nixon-era chip bags gathering dust and whatnot. Potato DNA is possibly coalescing into a super potato brain that will create a crude body out of potato bags and devastate several cities, before finally a giant semblance of French onion dip dropped from a helicopter Let it be brought down by And when that day comes, I’m sure someone will remember to update George Krum’s Wikipedia page accordingly.
Have a nice Thursday. The floor is open… What are you cheering for today?
Today’s Shameless C&J Testimonial
Whatever the temperature outside, it is always important to stay hydrated. drinking cheers and jeers kiddie pool water Not only cools you down, but also cools you down many other health benefitsSuch as regulating bowel movements, boosting athletic performance, and protecting your body’s vital tissues and organs.